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Offering a small school atmosphere for the Corvallis-Philomath community since 1984

Wednesday, December 9, 2020

Covid Consensus

Well, mortals make plans and God laughs, eh?  If you read my previous post, you know all about the holiday plans that my family and I are now cancelling.  My brother and his wife in Eugene were the first to say they had, in light of the ever-worsening pandemic, changed their minds about attending ANY holiday gatherings.  No amount of adjustment to our plan would suffice.  They were just out.  That got us all thinking about the risks and, as a group, we all decided that we will not be celebrating together in-person.  We will have a Zoom party on the Saturday before Christmas.  I'm not sure what we will do besides imbibe, but that will be a good start anyway!  

The day after our Zoom party, I will drive up to Vancouver to see my mom, sister, brother-in-law, niece and nephew, who are all in one household.  I will remain outside their house.  I'm going to back my Subaru Outback up to her front porch.  I will sit in the hatchback of my car, protected under cover rain or shine, while my family sits on their porch and we will sing Christmas carols.  It is very important to Mom to set eyes on me, but this particular weekend is our only window in which I can travel outside of Oregon and be back within our state's borders two weeks prior to reporting back to work.  It's 3 hours of driving for one hour of togetherness, but it will be worth it.  Never let it be said I wasn't a dutiful daughter!

This situation is disappointing to me and I'm sure many of you are making sacrifices to keep your family and community safe, too.  I am sad and sorry for all that you must give up this year, but very grateful for your willingness to do so.  I thank you and I wish you all a very happy holiday season: one unlike any other.  We will all remember this one, won't we?  

Warmest Winter Wishes,
Doni

Thursday, November 12, 2020

Hygiene for the Holidays!

 Season's Greetings!

I am very curious about how people are managing their holiday expectations this year and perhaps others are, too.  In that interest, I am writing today to tell you how Andy and I and other members of our family are spending our Thanksgiving and Christmas.  I will begin, however, with Veteran's Day, which was yesterday.  At 8 AM or so, I learned that Albany was putting on a "Reverse Veteran's Day Parade " out in the parking lot of the newly constructed YMCA.  The idea is that veteran's groups and businesses hosting veterans would set up an area in which veterans could stand or sit, some decorated and some not (I refer to the staged areas, not the vets themselves, many of whom, I'm sure, were very decorated!) and citizens could circle by in their cars and wave and call out their thanks.  I immediately started painting some posters that said "Veterans, we thank you!" and "We 💜 you!" and blew up many balloons.  I figured we would drive to the Y and then quickly tape up the posters and balloons to our ride.  We took our Chihuahua-mix, Penelope, in a color-coordinated sweater to match our decorations.  We left our lab-mix, Miley, at home as she is disturbed by loud noises and we were expecting a big turnout of motorcyclists.  I felt really badly about leaving Miley behind and gave her extra pets and treats as we left.  That is probably what distracted me and caused me to leave the bag holding the adhesive tape sitting on the kitchen floor.  When we got to the parade route and pulled over, I was so excited to decorate our "float," but found no tape!  We settled for holding our posters up ourselves out the open windows.  As no other vehicles decorated at all, we still stood out and the vets really appreciated our home made posters and cute puppy.  "Chihuahuas for veterans!" we called!

For Thanksgiving, our holiday will be largely unchanged.  We will go to our cabin on the lake as usual.  It has a propane oven and stove and we will cook a feast for two, read a lot and try to identify as many migratory waterfowl as possible.  Autumn and winter are best for birding on Ten Mile Lake!   Some years, we do attend a large family gathering in North Albany hosted by Nancy, my stepmother, who was married to my dad while he lived and is now married to my daughter-in-law's widowed father.  It's all very interwoven and Appalachian.  Our family tree twists around like a curly willow!   This year, however, Nancy and Gary will not welcome their usual 12-15 guests, but will instead prepare a delicious meal and deliver it to the would-be guests who live nearby.  That is the compromise they have chosen.  It allows them to stay safe and opt out of hosting a dangerous dinner, but they can still have that feeling of connection by sharing their sweet potatoes and stuffing with loved ones.  

My sister in Vancouver, WA, began planning a Christmas get-together a month or so ago.  She is the youngest of  us 3 siblings.  My older brother lives in Eugene with his wife.  Our mom is 84 and in good health, but does have some risk factors besides age.  She will be living with my sister and her family in Vancouver from Thanksgiving through the New Year.  Mom's age makes it feel timely and important, yet also risky for us to gather.  We are still weighing the risks and it is entirely possible that we may scrap the whole thing, but for now, this is our plan;  On Saturday, December 19, we intend to gather in my sister's old house, which is HUGE.  It is a former sanatorium for cerebral palsy patients and has also served as a dance studio and church offices.  It has since been moved high on a hill out of town.  It features a large, square central "hall" which is open via 3 archways to a library, parlor and dining room.  Since there are 3 households attending -  my sister's, mine and my brother's, she will set up a table for each group in each of those 3 rooms. We'll be at least 12 feet apart, but will see and hear each other across the empty hall.  We will all wear masks except for when dining.  Windows will be open and sweaters will be worn.  There will be no table of appetizers nor open bar to hover over. My mother will cook a simple, but delicious meal of turkey divan and, huzzah! will bake two desserts!  One lucky teen niece or nephew will do all the serving so there will be no shared utensils.  We will limit the gathering to 3 hours and will include a Christmas sing-a-long as I have been practicing carols on my ukulele!  We will wear masks and stay distant during the singing.  

My sister has recently suggested that we seek out COVID tests prior to our holiday.  I received an order from my doctor easily and have an appointment for the drive-thru testing facility near the Albany hospital 5 days before the dinner.  I will be quarantined as soon as school lets out.  That test will cost $150.  I have been informed that RiteAid offers free COVID tests and I will look into that as well.  I want to point out that although  I am traveling out of Oregon state for this gathering, it is early enough in the Winter Break that two weeks will have passed before I am reunited with the children and staff at PhMS.  

As you can see, we are putting a lot of thought into our holiday plans.  As COVID numbers rise in Benton and Linn Counties, this is the worst possible time to loosen up and become lax in defeating the spread.  The urge to congregate with our family and friends is stronger than ever due to our love of holiday traditions and the forced separation we have all endured thus far.  Unfortunately, NW winter weather is not conducive to planning outdoor gatherings unless one is hooked up with a sturdy canopy and outdoor heaters.  Although I remember sitting on the front porch in our shirtsleeves on Christmas Day more than once, my dad still alive and enjoying the sunshine, that is a blessing one cannot count on.  So we must all be self-sacrificing, creative, detail-oriented and disciplined this holiday season.  We must show our love by, perhaps, not being with those we love.  We may spread holiday warmth by sitting in a cold, but well-ventilated room.  We may fill charity food boxes instead of the mouths of our relatives. We may feast our eyes on just the eyes of our masked friends.

 You now know that I have, so far, not resisted the siren song of "Home for the Holidays," but my family and I are taking such precautions that I feel very confident that I am fulfilling my obligation to all of you at PhMS.  My highest priority is to be a good citizen of our state and our school and rest assured, I am playing my part in keeping our kids and staff safe and our school open for in-person instruction.  I know I can count on my PhMS community to do the same.  Jessica, Madi and I wish you and yours a joyful and safe holiday season. We treasure you!

Warmest Holiday Wishes,

Doni

Tuesday, September 22, 2020

No hugs?!?

 Dear friends, 

It is so wonderful to be back in the classroom, finally, with real live children!  All is going well and we get to practice lots of new procedures, such as putting work away, not directly back on the shelf, but on the “sani-table,” where Madi sanitizes it and then places it back on the shelf for the next child.   We get to practice hand washing a lot and that gets us all counting to twenty. We should all be able to chant the numbers 1-20 very well, very soon. 

One thing we don’t get to practice is hugging.  And that is sad.  The older kids and I were discussing this today.  They understand and accept this new requirement and are very agreeable to sitting apart, using the same table all day, wearing masks properly and all the measures we take to protect each other from “the virus.”  But we all agree that we miss hugging.  I was quite bereft at not being able to hug all the returning kids and their parents!  The children came up with a list of actions we can take, instead of hugging, to show our love for other people.  They came up with the following: saying “I love you,” writing love notes and letters, doing sign language for “I love you,” making a heart-shape with ones hands and drawing pictures and giving them to people, especially pictures of hearts.  I thought this was a really good list!  Great ideas there and I’m sure they’ll think of more.  

I later told the children that it was very important for humans to experience touching.  I said that it kept our spirits, bodies and brains healthy.  I suggested that they might need some extra touching from people in their household, such as their parents.  The kids came up with a number of ways that would be nice to touch and be touched by their parents.  Here is the list: hugging, holding hands, snuggling, back rubs and back tickles.  As one child said, “There are lots of ways to touch!”  

This is a short blog post for me, but I really just wanted to reach out and connect.    We have all been through and are going through some extraordinary times.  Seeing you returning parents in the parking lot as you drop off kids, restraining myself from coming to hug you and ask you how you are, knowing we will not be potlucking and catching up is distressing to me.  I feel as if we are in a war, have been away from each other fighting this war, and as if some of us never came home from the war.  I say this to acknowledge the families who have decided to keep their kids home instead of joining us for their second or third year.  Of course, I understand their difficult decisions, but I miss them just the same.  But in times like these, it is vital to focus on what we do have, rather than what is lacking.  I am so grateful to be working at my craft and providing this opportunity for our kids.  I am grateful for all of you who have joined us and trust us to keep your kids safe and developing as normally as possible in a year that is anything but normal.  Thank you!  And as you’ve no doubt heard many, many times, “we are all in this together!”


Warmest Regards,

Doni  

Thursday, July 2, 2020

Doni Distances

Dear Friends,

I am missing you all!  I just thought I would check in and let you know that my PhMS community is very much in my thoughts.  I hope you are all doing well this summer and living in the "now" as much as possible as that is all we have.  I have done some socializing under these new conditions and I thought some might like to hear of my adventures!

My BFF of 3 decades, Carla,  lives in Vancouver, WA.  We met at Willamette Mission State Park, which is equidistant between our two homes, for 4 hours of picnicing in our own folding chairs, catching up and singing along to my ukulele.

I went to Pauline Tanaka's (our school's founder) and Allan Rack's home in Alsea for an outdoor luncheon and a long visit.  Allan has created a veritable arboretum out there and we lunched and listened to the birdsong emitting from the 27 different varieties of trees that he had planted.  With just 3 of us it was pretty easy to keep distant, although I would have been comfortable with a longer dining table.  I felt very at-ease eating their delicious food as I understand the novel coronavirus is not easily spread through food.  And they have excellent hygiene, I must say.

Andy and I spent a few days at our small cabin on Ten Mile Lake and Carla joined us, camping in her own tent and socializing only outdoors.  There were a few moments that I wish we had had masks handy, because we were a bit close, but didn't.  These are awkward times, socially, are they not, when one's mask protects others better than oneself and we rely on others donning a mask to protect our personal health?  I feel a bit helpless and ineffectual at times, relying on others to save me from a terrible fate. 

In a couple of weeks, I will go up to Vancouver, WA, where my sister and her family also live, for the day.  They have been working on their outdoor space and now have an entertaining area.  We plan to break bread and have an outdoor screening of "Hamilton!"  (They have Disney+ and we do not.)  If it gets too late, I can sleep in my Subaru.  I've kind of always wanted to! 

This morning, I had a beautiful walk with my neighbor, friend, Montessori colleague and PhMS board member, Kathleen Lloyd.  It was heavenly to renew our fellowship and for me to spend quality time with  another of my tribe. She had lots of personal news to report, all happy.   At some areas of the walk, where we couldn't be spread out due to traffic, we wore our masks.  It was reassuring to spend time with someone so intelligent and science-minded who is as equally cautious as myself.  It lets me know I'm on the right vapor-free path!

Well, folks, that's what I've been up to, in case you've wondered about me.  I have also been having nearly daily afternoon naps on my front porch and I am back to volunteering at Safehaven, now twice per week. It's kitten season, by the way - lots of kittens!  And we have the most charming and friendly little Dutch rabbit - Luna.  You can see our animals on our website and meet them by appointment these days. 

Very Best Regards,
Doni




Sunday, June 14, 2020

Congratulations, Graduates!


Dear Friends,

I am feeling the need to process my feelings regarding our end-of-the-year punctuation mark, our graduation celebration.  My heart is so full because our grads really got into the spirit of the event, that spirit being manifested in the awesome vehicle decorations we beheld!  I wish we could have all strolled around, like at a car show, and admired the fantastic artwork and party decor on display, but that would have been unwise and unsafe.  I think Jessica and  I got to see more of your efforts than anyone and I can testify to the excellence I saw.  So, thank you, everyone, for your enthusiasm and spirit.  I thank especially the two families of younger classmates who waited patiently to drive through and show their support of their elders.  I refrain from using families' names here in the blog, but you two families know who you are and you warmed my heart and those of us all, yes, you did! Thank you!

Here is a cute story:  As those of you who attended already know, Lisa Pierce, wife of Dr. Jim Pierce, pastor at the College United Methodist Church, recorded not only the ceremony itself, but the arrivals of our families as well as the departure of our "parade" after the commencement exercises.  She made that link available to me and I shared it with my bestie of 30+ years, Carla.  She watched the whole thing.  I myself would have fast-forwarded through A LOT of it, but then I would have missed what she saw in an unguarded moment.  Carla knows that I have been dedicated to remaining inviolate from the novel coronavirus.  I have been to nary a store nor establishment since mid-March. No one has crossed our threshhold.  (Although I have just started back volunteering at Safehaven, all masked up and distant from the skeleton crew.  Yay!)  So when she saw one of our sweet little graduates approach  me from behind, bouquet outstretched, unbeknownst to me, after I had been making obvious efforts to remain distant from the gathered company, she could not help, as she watched,  but start humming to herself as he drew nearer, ever nearer, the theme from "Jaws!"  Da-dum...Da-dum...Da-dum, Da-dum, Da-dum DA-DUM! DA-DUM!!  End of cute story.

Then, as we took off for our "parade" (Jessica privately pondered, "Is it a parade if no one is watching?" But that is one for the ages) and went through town, we passed by a socially distant group of  Black Lives Matter demonstrators!  (Note to future demonstrators; being spaced out from each other like that really increases the visual presence of a small group!)  Some of us honked and waved  to them and they gave it right back, hollering "Congratulations!" as we passed! I just loved that mutual support going back and forth and was happy for the kids that they did have parade-attendees, after all!  And maybe this exchange lead to some important conversations, who knows? 

The weather was cooperative, the CUMC bent over backwards to lend us the PA system and tech support and our grads showed up in full-force and in full regalia.  We had unexpected community support on our parade route and we all got home by wine-thirty.  All in all, a very successful mid-pandemic pre-school graduation, as those things go.  Thank you to all for being so game!  I wish you all a safe and happy summer and a happy school situation next fall!

Warmest regards,
Doni

Friday, June 5, 2020

Racial Injustice and Unrest Right Now


Dear Friends,

I think it would be cowardly of me not to address the unrest in our country at this time, which is symptomatic of our troubled past and troubling present as a nation.  I have no words of wisdom to offer, only a commitment to be part of the solution to the shame of racial injustice in America.

As regards our children, it is important to have conversations about fairness, equality, diversity and prejudice during these "formative" years: the First Plane of Development, from birth to age 6 and then beyond and into the Second, Third and Fourth Planes.  We make it a practice at PhMS to tell true stories and read children's books about the civil rights struggle, about the plight of enslaved persons in the US and in other places as we learn about world history and geography. During those same studies we learn of the challenges that history has presented and the triumph of the human spirit witnessed in all races, religions and walks of life.  We share stories about historic persons of all races and events pertaining to empiricism and the longing for freedom.  We relish the works of indigenous poets, authors and artists of the countries we study. We take care that our library represents a rainbow of experiences offering both "windows" and "mirrors" for all of our children to see. They see their own culture(s) reflected as well as glimpses into lives unlike their own.

I tell you this not to congratulate ourselves for all we have done to combat prejudice and celebrate differences. That would be grossly tone-deaf when there is clearly so much more to be done; merely the first step of this journey has been taken, inspired by the most recent martyrdoms of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, Ahmaud Arbery and the dangerously ridiculous harassment of birdwatcher Christian Cooper. I tell of some of what we do with our charges to illustrate that difficult subjects can and should be addressed with pre-school-age children.  Parents have their own wisdom regarding what they wish to share about racial inequality and at this age, the values you impart become part of the child's world-view and character.  Our public library has many age-appropriate books to support your message.  Even Pinterest has your back.

I encourage you to read a post just one or two prior to this entitled "What Do We Tell the Kids?" which I wrote to aid parents in discussing the pandemic, but is meant to be helpful regardless of  difficult subject matter.  I strongly, strongly discourage, however, sharing with young children the current images of violence being perpetrated either by law enforcement or by looters and rioters.  These images are too immediate and current to be safely processed by the immature mind. We are all having trouble ourselves, are we not?  Pathological levels of stress and anxiety, bad dreams and fitful sleep and the absorption of prejudice could easily result.  Keep the news off when the children are around.  They truly cannot handle it in that raw form.  It must be thoughtfully distilled to a child-friendly potency.  Rather, print an image of unity: cops kneeling beside protesters, hugs, listening, peaceful marching, and hang it on the fridge.  Evil has awakened our collective and overdue outrage, but only goodness and love will move us forward. 

In Peace,
Doni

Monday, May 11, 2020

"All Work is Equally Valuable"

                                "All work is equally valuable." Maria Montessori

This is surely one of Dr. Montessori's more memorable quotes because it is so short.  I remember hearing this for the first time during my training.  It, among other words of wisdom, went into the beaker full of the rest of the Kool-aid that I was unable to immediately consume as I did not fullly understand it, nor believe it.  I began my work with the children trusting that this as well other bon mots of Maria's would eventually resonate.  I soon recognized it's truth in the microcosm of our Prepared Environment.  I radically embraced the notion that floor scrubbing is as valuable as multiplication in the sense that one child would find their way to Normalization through Practical Life and another child would find it in Mathematics at any given time in their individual development.  But there are jobs and there are careers, right?

Initially I found myself at odds with the idea of all work being equally valuable because that was counter to my upbringing and what I thought I knew about the world.  Surely it's better to be a doctor than a ditch-digger.  Surely an advertising executive for Pall Mall cigarettes is the lowest form of life.
As I pondered this over the years, I decided that there were probably fewer ridiculous occupations in Dr Montessori's day.  See, there I go judging again, which is diametrically in opposition to the point of my article today.  In fact, though, manual labor was more highly respected in the past than in modern times.  An honest day's work for an honest day's pay and all that.  I have seen photographs of the workers of the Works Progress Administration during FDR's New Deal.  Their exuberance and pride as they held high their picks and shovels leaps off the image.  And today, there is a resurgence of interest in the trades. There is a realization that not every young person needs a university education and the world's needs are very diverse, requiring a diverse work force.  

As I joyfully greet the delivery person bringing me my precious goods that I was too scared (and wise) to purchase in a store, I realize how desperately I need the service this guy is providing.  As I pick up some take-out food, so looking forward to eating something not prepared at home, I cannot help but thank the server for working during this crisis.  I am so grateful!  I am humbly indebted to the grocery store cashiers, the train conductors, the now-unemployed army of hospitality workers, the farmers, servers and manufacturers that I have taken for granted until now.  I truly never appreciated the legions of people who support my life and my lifestyle until so many of them vanished from my life.  Maybe the movement for a higher minimum wage signifies that many other folks had been valuing these workers all along.

These jobs  are not glamorous nor prestigious, but I think people can see now, more than ever, that they are absolutely vital, "essential", as they say and that many more high-status positions are, in fact, not.  But embracing the theme, these non-essential occupations are also, equally important.  Perhaps they create beauty, entertain us, bring us comfort, create more jobs, add to the collective understanding or otherwise enrich our world. In any case, this crisis has brought me one step closer to understanding Dr. Montessori's wisdom, expressed in that simple quote, "All work is equally valuable."  I am committing now to sustaining this feeling of gratitude towards the workers of the world - paid and unpaid- in good times and bad.  I'm sorry it took a pandemic to awaken me.  

Wednesday, May 6, 2020

What Do We Tell the Kids?

Dearest Guide,

My mate and I are struggling with what to tell our young kids about Recent World Events.  We don't want to overwhelm or worry them, but they see the masks and our elaborate disinfecting routines and have questions.  How much should we tell them when we don't know all the answers and the answers seem to change every day?

Sincerely, Information Overloaded

Dear Overloaded,

Since we are now, what, close to 2 months into this ( I go by the date of March 12, when the schools were closed) I sincerely wish I had addressed your concern earlier.  By now, you have probably found just what to say to your little ones regarding the Covid-19 pandemic.  But our other readers, Gentle Parent, can still benefit from such a topic because this is surely not the last World Event we will have to get through whilst rearing our children and not the last difficult topic we will need to address.

Whether it is a pandemic, violence, war, poverty, injustice and inequality, marital discord at home, bigotry, sex and gender issues, folks with special needs, religious differences, death or cruelty, stuff happens.  Kids are exposed.  They have questions.  My best and most general advice is to answer those questions, but that's all.  By their questions, your children will tell you what they need to know to make sense of a situation.  Just satisfy their needs without giving them more information than they are asking for.  We want to avoid giving them more than they can handle.

More questions will arise.  Answer them as they do. I also advise parents to be honest with a child when they don't have a ready, well-thought-out answer.  It is preferable to organize your thoughts, beliefs and what you really want to transmit to your child than to slop out an immediate reply.  It is wonderful to say, "I appreciate your question.  It is an important one and I want to give it some thought before I answer.  I will get back to you soon to discuss this."  Then be sure you do collect your thoughts and prepare your presentation.  I remember a fantastic mom who was put on the spot when her child was asking loudly about someone's physical disability who was a fellow passenger on the bus the mother and child were riding.  She was at a loss and embarrassed.  That might have been a time to employ the above tactic.

Sidenote:   I have also heard a wonderful speaker at a Montessori conference who would advise this mom to respectfully ask the passenger if he/she would mind if her child asked about their situation. The speaker was a fellow teacher and when she went out with her elementary students on the outings that 2nd Plane Montessori students organize themselves, the students would show interest in some of the people they encountered, people lacking housing, for example.  And she guided them in how to engage a stranger in a meaningful exchange, if amenable to both parties.

But back to your query, Gentle Parent, about this Recent World Event - the pandemic.  I would answer your children's questions as honestly, simply and briefly as possible.   Verity, clarity, brevity, levity is my motto!  Sometimes the levity doesn't work too well with pre-schoolers as they are so literal, but it rhymed so nicely!  Maybe just stick with true, clear and brief.  I am grateful for your question, Gentle Reader and hope I didn't give YOU more than you asked for, but heeded my own advice.  Wishing your family the very best in this difficult time, I remain,

Your Guide,
Doni

Tuesday, May 5, 2020

Are We Having Fun Yet?

Gentle Parents,

Are you and your gang having enough fun?  Just checking.  I'm worried about you.  Let's just go down my fun checklist, okay?

     * Have you visited the Benton County Library website?  There are many forms of entertainment available there, even for those who do not have a library card.  One of the older boys in our class has been listening to lots of audiobooks and his parents tell me that it is a point of focus for him and that he retains so much of what he hears.  I also think an entire family all sitting around listening to a story together makes for a cozy and relaxing way to wind-down.   And there is much more available on the website.

     * Did you know that Wildlife Safari in Winston, OR is still open?  Remain safe and comfy in your vehicle as you drive through and see the animals in (and out of!) their enormous enclosures.  Forgive the teacher in me for saying there could be some great work leading up to and following such an excursion.  One could research an animal they were keen on seeing there and write a report or make a booklet of pictures and labels depicting and identifying a handful of animals expected to be seen on the safari.  One could write a haiku and leave it there for the cheetahs to enjoy:

                                                   Cheetahs run and leap
                                              You never hear them coming
                                                     until it's too late
     
     * Every song you might ever want to karaoke is available on YouTube!  Search like this:  YouTube Karaoke Foo Fighters Learn to Fly or YouTube Karaoke Keep on the Sunny Side.  They are ALL THERE!  It's so much fun! Your kids can sing songs they already know without needing to  be able to read the lyrics and they will really enjoy seeing Mamas and Papas get so silly as they belt out their favorites.  Best of all, when you come to the part of the song you don't know at all, you can just stop and pick another song you might know. You don't have to stand up there helplessly, knowing that you are over your head while everyone in the karaoke bar judges you.

     * Have you painted rocks and left them out in your neighborhood to delight others?  This is best done with acrylic paints which you can purchase over the phone with your credit card at Michael's and they will bring it out to you for curb-side pick-up.  You might want to stock up on pipe cleaners, tissue paper, Elmer's glue, Tacky glue and a couple of watercolor sets while you are at it.

Okay, Gentle Parents, if you have done all of the above and the dipstick is still registering "low" on your fun tank, someone, (not me!) should set up a Zoom cocktail party for all of us.  Maybe we can come up with more ideas if we put our collectively addled brains to it!  Busily planning more fun YouTube videos for you, I remain,

Your Guide,
Doni



Tuesday, April 28, 2020

It Takes a Technician!

Gentle Readers,

Please indulge me as I write this post to effusively thank my husband, Andy Cyrus, for all his help during our stay-at-home period.  Without his help and patience, there is no way I would be able to join you on the Zoom class meetings or post all these videos on our Philomath Montessori YouTube channel.  Believe me, I am not exaggerating my incompetence in this area.  I have cried real tears of frustration more than once in trying to figure all this out.  I lack ability and patience in this area, for sure.  Jessica is of tremendous help, but she is remote, of course, and guides me as best she can on the phone.  But I  don't just need technical support.  I need real-time, hands-on rescue!  Andy has been my savior many times in the last few weeks.  (Although he has threatened to withdraw his support if I can't muster up a better attitude. I do get understandably cranky at such times.)  Andy has also been doing the weekly grocery shopping for 3 of our elderly neighbors, so I am not the only one in his fan club right now.

Thank you, Andy, from me, our neighbors and my school, for all you are doing to support us in our time of need.

Your Guide and Andy's Grateful Wife,

Doni


Print Alphabet for First Grade

Dearest Guide,

Don't you usually help the 3rd year students transition from your cursive alphabet to the print alphabet they use in all the public schools?  What am I to do to prepare my 6 year old for first grade?  I don't know how to do that!

Sincerely,  Scrabbling and Scribbling


Dear Scrabbling,

You are absolutely right, Gentle Parent. We do typically spend the last month of the school year offering the graduating children the opportunity to practice the formation of the print alphabet.  They are already very familiar with the letters from having read, almost exclusively, words in print, but haven't written them much.  We offer them handouts with letters to trace and copy, which, using arrows, indicate the proper path the pencil should take in forming the letter.  The children are usually very excited about this rite of passage and eagerly practice on the handouts.  For all of our parents whose children are moving on to another school system, I encourage you to provide such penmanship practice for your child no later than one month before the new school year begins.  That should offer plenty of time to master the formation of these letters.  If you or your child wish to get cracking on this earlier, that is absolutely fine, too.  At this point, under these circumstances, I am perfectly willing for your child to begin this transition at any time now.  There will be handouts available to download, print and practice on from our Distance Learning tab at our PhMS website.  I'm sure other parents had this question nagging them at the backs of their minds as well, Gentle Parent, so thank you for your inquiry.  It is my hope that the children continue to use both alphabets as they progress. A hand-written letter will always contain more of the soul of the writer than one tapped out on a keyboard and a fine cursive hand represents a well-rounded education and a certain panache.  I hate to think of these awesome kids living without panache!  It haunts me!   I remain,

Your Guide,
Doni


Thursday, April 23, 2020

Little Kid Activities

Dearest Guide,

The 3 R's are great for the older kids, but what can you suggest for my little guy, nearly 3, who loved his Montessori classroom so much and was so satisfied by his work there?  What can we do to help him feed his little soul, mind and body here at home?

Signed, Doting Mom

Dear Doting,

Hooray for our little guys, right?  I hope he is having a great time at his home.   Here are some  ideas your special fella may enjoy:

* Trim the grass at the edges with a pair of blunt children's scissors.
* Sidewalk chalk
* Wash the sidewalk with a bucket and scrub brush.
* "Paint" a fence, deck or house with a housepainter's brush and a bucket of water to dip it in.
* Bubbles
* Tub toys outdoors in a big tub of water, such as a storage bin.  A child can easily drown in such a tub.  This must be continuously supervised.
* Dig in the dirt.
* Move a stack of firewood or heavy rocks from one area to another.  Use a STURDY bucket, little wheelbarrow or gloved hands alone.
* Wipe the baseboards with a damp rag.
* Make pinecone birdfeeders with peanut butter and sunflower seeds.  Wash your hands afterwards.
* Scrub the birdbath.  Wash your hands afterwards.
* Make musical instruments by putting gravel in one cottage cheese container and rice in another.  Hear the difference?
* Find all the squares he can in his home.  Say "square" each time.  Now do the rectangles.
* Wash bikes, trikes, scooters and car wheels with a bucket, scrub brush, bar of soap and sponge.
* Play "Run and Touch."  Say, "Run and touch something shiny" "something wet" "something heavy" "something round"  "something near."  Great way to learn adjectives and get your heart rate up!
* Play "The Preposition Game." Say, "Stand next to Dad."  "Sit in front of the fireplace."  "Run around the shed."  "Get behind the sofa."  Prepositions are the words that tell us where things are in relation  to other things.
* Cut out pictures from old magazines together.
* Invite him to "sort" those pictures.  I wonder what categories he will dream up?
* String macaroni. It's a necklace!  Glue it on a carton of Stash tea. It's a jewelery box!  Cook it.  It's dinner!

Gentle Parent, I hope this list provides some fodder for your whole child: mind, body and spirit. Thank you for writing as I'm sure others are glancing about for potential activities for their wee ones as well.  Wishing you and your little tyke many hours of enjoyment, I remain,

Your Guide,
Doni

Ramadan is here!

Ramadan, the holiest month of the Islamic year is upon us, beginning at sundown tonight.  At today's online class group meeting, I will inform the kids.  It is a complex holiday with many traditions and revealing insights into the foundations of the Muslim religion.  It is wonderful that it lasts one whole month, which will allow me to tell short stories each day we meet, gradually sharing all the richness of Ramadan, finally ending with  the breaking of the fast, the joyous Eid-al-Fitr.

At Easter time, for the past few years, The History Channel has broadcast an excellent mini-series, "The Bible."  It's sophisticated production really brought to life all the Bible stories I grew up hearing as a child. I have re-watched it several times. When I was a kid, the Bible was everywhere.  Most of my knowledge of the Good Book probably came from my doctor's office waiting room, where they had copies of the "Children's Illustrated Bible" along with "Highlights" for our entertainment.  I was fascinated by the story of the Flood and the graphic illustration of the poor sinners pounding on Noah's Arc as the waters rushed up around them, sealing their doom. Even though we were very inconsistent in our church-going, I absorbed a lot of the Christian tradition and oral history just through living in these United States. I happen to know more Bible stories than some of my Catholic friends who went to church "religiously" and learned all their catechisms and such.  My point is, back in my day, even the non-religious among us were exposed to a lot of Bible stories.  Quran stories, not so much.  (Case in point, spell-check did not know what to make of the word "Quran."

Ever since I first enjoyed that wonderful presentation of "The Bible" on The History Channel, I have thought how great it would be if they could produce one entitled "The Quran."  That's the book that non-Islamic Americans know so little about, but that is so important to a near-majority of the world's faithful.  29% of the world's people declare themselves to be Christian, 24% to be Muslim and 14% are Hindu. Islam is the world's fastest-growing religion. Yet everyone knows about Noah and Jesus and Lot's wife turning into a pillar of salt.  We know about doves and olive branches and rainbows and fatted calves and prodigal sons even if we aren't Christian.  It is part of the culture and we don't find it threatening. But many people seem to feel threatened by Islam.  They seem to know a couple of concepts about the religion that do not suit them (veiling comes up a lot) and write if off as inferior to their own.  Or inferior to having no religion at all.  That is why we need a great blockbuster production of "The Quran" to make this holy book come alive for the general populace as well.  These are the stories we don't know.. Or do we?

Many people don't realize how much Islam, Judaism and Christianity have in common.  They are all 3 Abrahamic religions, stemming from old Abraham's first encounter with God.  The Quran recognizes and tells stories of many of the same people as the Torah and the New Testament - Jesus, the Angel Gabriel, John the Baptist, Jacob, Elijah, Moses, all the heavy-hitters.  They have the story of the Flood, the plagues of Egypt, the Exodus, and others that are shared, with their own twists, to be sure, with the other Judeo-Christian religions.  My point is, it is our ignorance of Islam that creates suspicion.  That and a few yahoos doing unspeakable things and declaring it to be done in the name of Muhammad. This is a terrible blow to Islam.

So, if you know any Hollywood producers, please put the above bug in their ear.  I think Westerners would shell out $10 to satisfy their curiosity about this religion (without having to read the whole Quran) and would be better world citizens at the end.  Mark Burnett, the producer of  the CBS show "Survivor" and his wife, actress Roma Downey (who played Jesus' mother, Mary, beautifully) produced "The Bible,"  out of their own religious devotion.  I think it would serve humanity even more to elucidate us on the fascinating stories of this other, less-well-known-to-some-of-us religion.  Dr Montessori reminded us that we can only love that which we know.  Let's all get to know Islam a little better.

Your Guide,
Doni

Friday, April 17, 2020

Grace and Courtesy to the Rescue!

Dearest Guide,

It seems that familiarity is truly breeding contempt for my brood as we have been cooped up for far too many weeks. Sibling rivalry has become a constant source of discord in our home.  Any suggestions?

Sincerely, Why Did I Have Two?

Dear Why Did I,

You aren't the only parent who is worried for her offspring's present and future relationships.  And you are wise to arm yourself with knowledge, as gone unchecked, sibling rivalry can become so toxic, a child can become so jealous and competitive that it seeps into all aspects of their lives.  They become pathologically fierce, needing to win at all costs, in all things, all arguments, by fair means or foul.

That won't happen here, Gentle Parent, as you are taking steps to help the children in your family manage their relationships. Let's begin with the Montessori tradition of Lessons of Grace and Courtesy.  These are little plays that show, as the name suggests, a courteous and graceful way of interacting with others in a social situation. In a Montessori classroom the children learn that respecting others is so important that special lessons are presented on the subject.  A guide in the Casa dei Bambini, sometimes with the help of an assistant or a child, gathers a small group to show, for example, "How to close a door quietly."  "How to carry a tray horizontally." " How to ask someone for help." "How to blow one's nose."  "How to ask to borrow something."  "How to offer help."  "How to walk around someone's work."  "How to observe without interruption."  "How to offer someone a snack."  "How to offer a guest a seat."  "How to decline a request."  "How to take turns."  "How to pass by a group or pair of people."  And the list goes on infinitely.  We identify lessons that need to be shown and who especially needs to see them by observing our group's dynamics. The lessons are always given to a group (I often show our whole group, but then, I always was a rebel!) in order to avoiding singling anyone out.  These lessons are used as an alternative to nagging, shaming, threatening, punishing and other untasty tactics.

To present a lesson, the guide will tell the name of the lesson.  "I'm going to show you how to move out of someone's way when they say 'Excuse me.'"  Another lesson that might be wise to give pretty closely on the heels of this one might be "How to wait patiently for someone to move out of your way."  The guide and her helper, the assistant or child, show how to perform this little nicety, which they have practiced beforehand.  There is no extraneous talk or action to distract from the elements of  making the request for accommodation by saying "Excuse me" and the accommodation of moving out of the area needing to be accessed.  After that is shown once, perhaps twice, the guide asks children to model what they have just witnessed for the rest of the group, assigning roles to two children.  The children perform the rite as well as they are able. A few other children are chosen to demonstrate.  The guide tries to choose two really capable children to be the final model, our last impression. 

I have recently learned about, but have not yet implemented the idea of having a basket with various Grace and Courtesy Lessons written on them, which children can act out together, practice, polish and present to a small group of children.  I love this idea and look forward to doing this one day.  I can see this activity playing itself out in a home setting.  You, Gentle Parent, could identify some interactions between family members that would make home life more harmonious if they were carried out in a more peaceable way.  Envision what you would like them to look like.  Is it a one-person show like, "how to clear your place after a meal" or a duet such as "how to ask for space to calm down." If you need a fellow actor, seek one of your kids or another adult in your household to practice the mini-play with.  If it is the latter and you are working with a partner, one of you will be the person seeking connection and the other will be the person seeking space in this example. Let's call them C (for connection) and S (for space).  C says something like, "Can't we just talk about this?" and S says something like, "I need some space right now.  I'll be back when I'm ready to talk."  S walks away and C watches him go.  End scene. 

After you and your partner have practiced this, decide when it would be a good time to gather your group and have your performance.  Be lighthearted, but sincere.  Do what actors call "committing to the part."  Don't act like you think it's silly or embarrassing, but show how much you care about this.  After all, you've been practicing!  "Mommy and I have practiced a Lesson of Grace and Courtesy we want to show you.  Please be seated on the couch."  Make eye contact with your audience to see that they are ready to receive the lesson. Take your places and show it just like you rehearsed.  Did they love it?  Do it again!  Now say, "who wants to take a turn playing one of these parts?"  or " who wants to show Mommy and me how to do it?"  See if they will take a turn. If not, that's okay.  Just say, "I'm going to write this down on a card and put it in our new Grace and Courtesy basket.  If you want to take it out and do it later, it will be here."  And you write down, or perhaps you have already written "How to ask for space to calm down."  There!  You just started a fun new collection!

After you demonstrate a few of these, you could suggest that your children observe what Lessons of Grace and Courtesy your family might benefit from.  Choosing, planning, practicing and performing the lessons could be a really fun family activity they turn to again and again.  Lessons of Grace and Courtesy are one way we head off discord before its seeds are sown. 

As for other ways to put a stop to sib squabbles, I highly recommend what Positive Parenting has to say.  They offer an article online "How to End Sibling Rivalry in 6 Simple Steps" that is really excellent.  I'm sorry I didn't include a link, but I don't know how to do that here.  This post is not complete, however, without you at least skimming the 6 simple ideas contained in that article.  I chose not to reiterate them for you here and give credit where it is due.  They are all superb and effective ideas that will make your family happier!  Kudos to Positive Parenting.   Thank you for writing in, Gentle Parent.  Wishing you ever increasing peace and harmony, I remain,

Your Guide,
Doni


Saturday, April 11, 2020

All Children, Everywhere

Gentle Parents,

As I was watching Good Morning America this morning while Andy made biscuits and gravy for our breakfast, there was an article to support now home-schooling parents.  This expert, and I forget her name and credentials, suggested putting the work into 3 metaphorical "buckets."  The first bucket is the "Must Do" bucket. This is everything that must be turned in for a grade and everything that has a due date.  The next bucket is the "Would Like to Do" bucket, which is projects and activities that interest the kids that they would like to pursue.  The third bucket is the "Maybe We Will, Maybe We Won't" bucket, which is work that no one really wants to do and which has few, if any repercussions if it is not done.  Busy-work falls into this bucket and if you never get to it, I guess it doesn't matter. 

I liked the above categories.  They might work for some families, especially those with school-age kids.  This expert went on to espouse "unschooling," which she described as following the children's interests, for example, ladybugs.  One could capture ladybugs, study ladybugs, research ladybugs, do ladybug-centric art and gardening activities, etc.  I was about to take umbrage that Dr. Montessori's edict to "follow the child" was not credited, when I paused.  At a recent Association Montessori International Refresher Course, I was introduced to a quote from Dr. Montessori's granddaughter, Renilde Montessori, a world-renowned pedagogist, lecturer and trainer of teachers who is recently deceased which stated that she longed for the day when the name "Montessori" would be forgotten, but her concept of education would be known everywhere.  It would just be the way all children, everywhere, were brought up, according to natural laws of development, creating health, lighting up brains with love and bringing the world to peace as we adults focus on what really matters.

 Wishing you all a beautiful weekend as you keep everyone safe by staying home.  I know many of you celebrate Easter and I wish you a happy holiday.  I am sorry I missed wishing my Jewish friends a Happy Passover in my blog, but I did text you!  Yours in celebration, I remain,

Your Guide,
Doni

Thursday, April 9, 2020

Hooray for Geography!

Dearest Guide,

One thing that my children miss the most about their Montessori classroom are the geography studies you do.  How do you go about that?  What is the order in which concepts are introduced?

Signed, Citizen of the World

Dear Citizen,

I am happy to tell you what we do in our Prepared Environment, but I must warn you, it's origins are now murky.  Having done this work in the classroom for over 30 years, I can no longer remember what was part of my training and what I gleaned at teachers' conferences over the years.  I do know that it was hugely influenced by the founder of Philomath Montessori School, Pauline Tanaka.  Pauline taught me how to organize a unit and create a schedule of geography studies over a 3 year cycle in a casa dei bambini. Ever grateful to you, Pauline!

In all Montessori studies, we begin with the whole and the explore the parts.  In learning about biology, we learn that things are either living or non-living.  We then get more specific.  Living things are either plants or animals (we delve into ambiguous fungi later). Let us now learn about one specific animal that the child is interested in and learn about the parts of its anatomy or it's life cycle. And our knowledge gets broader and yet more specific as we continue discovering.  Animals are either vertebrates or invertebrates.  Vertebrates are either mammals, fish, reptiles, birds or amphibians.  One could get more specific depending on interest.  One could divide one of those classes into orders, such as mammals into carnivores, insectivores, bats, primates, rodents, ungulates, etc. One could further divide one of those orders, say, carnivores, into families such as canidae, felidae and so on. 

Oops!   I digress, but it is interesting so I will not delete it.  So, following that same principal, in geography, we begin with the Earth.  The whole Earth in the form of a globe.  At school, we have two: one to show the distribution, in a tactile way, of land and water surface and one to show the continents and oceans.  Then we soon move to our first Puzzle Map, the World Puzzle Map, which allows one to remove and handle all of the continents. At home, it is a wonderful thing to have a globe or a map of the world on the wall to refer to.

Another principal of Montessori education is that we offer the child a sensorial experience first, before offering a language/vocabulary experience.  We allow the child to attach to the material and assimilate some of the ideas and concepts held within.  Now the child has some skin in the game.  This child may ask, "what is this?"  and show that they want to know the names of these continents.  So we teach them, over a length of time which, in my experience, differs VASTLY from child to child.  Please refer to the post from March 23,2020 "Adapting to New Times," which goes over how we teach vocabulary in a "3 Period Lesson."  Another fortunate aspect of Montessori education is the curriculum is laden with its own rewards.  In our classroom (every classroom is different), once a child knows the names of the continents, they may craft a lovely map of their own to take home either by tracing and drawing or by painstakingly perforating color-coded paper to tear out in the shape of the continents and adhering them to a large paper drawing of the two hemispheres.  Kids love that stuff!

Once the names of the continents are known, we move on to a more specific (remember that principal?) study of geography, the North America Puzzle Map.  Just to be clear, kids in South America start with their own home continent, Africans, Europeans, etc do likewise.  The child has a sensorial experience of this map now, which is divided into the countries that make up North America, from Greenland to Panama. Then we can learn the names of the countries.  Then we can study and learn to identify their flags. Now we can move onto a new continent.  Yep.  Happens just that fast. Wink.

I don't want this to be too long so, as concisely as possible, this is how I prepare for a unit of geographical study.  I choose a country of interest, preferably that has a holiday I want to celebrate happening around the time I want to do the unit.  Then I begin my research, learning some of the following: location, geography, climate, biomes, indigenous animals and plants, indigenous peoples and ancient civilizations, language, religion, etiquette and folk ways, traditional arts, crafts, music and cuisine, modes of transportation and communication, dress: both contemporary and traditional, historical events, the form of government, the current leader, poets, artists, authors, current events, crops, exports, imports.....Phew!  There may be more, but I am going by memory here. 

All or some of this is usually presented in the form of short true stories.  It is delivered in dribs and drabs, not wishing to try one's audience.  I will often show one or several still images on our electronic tablet.  I will show a lemur if I am telling about lemurs.  I try to show the whole creature or image.  Children are very literal and trusting.  Once, many years ago, some historical reeenactors came to teach my class about Lewis and Clark.  One artifact they showed was a bit of bear pelt about the size of your hand.  After they left, one of my kids said, "I thought they were much bigger." 

At school, I painstakingly teach myself to sing songs in languages I do not know by choosing the simplest one I can find on YouTube, searching for the lyrics and listening to it over and over, line by line, writing it down phonetically for myself.  Then I teach it to the kids by telling them the meaning of the song, then going over it line by line in a call and respond format, so that they can hear (my very best attempt at) the sounds to be reproduced.  Thereafter, I usually just start singing the song daily and they join in, more and more, as they are able.  We also learn phrases of the (usually official) language of the country.  We learn to count, perhaps say the names of colors or days of the week.  I have a fantasy of meeting someone from Indonesia or Mongolia and bonding hard because I can greet them in their language and sing their favorite song from childhood.

We do our Walking on the Line to music from the country we study and we dance to it as well.  We try to recreate a craft or art form.  We try to create a Practical Life activity for the study.  For example, if one were studying India around Divali time, one could make dayas (lamps) out of cotton and ghee.  If one were studying Peru, one could card fleece or wool and learn to weave. When studying the Anasazi of the Southwest US, one can make clay pots.  If one is studying South Africa, one could grind corn with a mortar and pestle or mechanical grinder after seeing an image of this being done with those huge stand-up varieties.  One can act out activities that are not part of one's own life.  A small group of kids and I acted out a communal grinding of grain, each taking their turn to raise their massive imaginary pestles to bring it down and crush our invisible grain without breaking our rhythm. Super, super fun.  Or we might act out the actions of a fox listening for a mouse in the snow and then pouncing, or a bower bird gathering decor for his nest, or a Yanomami poling a canoe down the Amazon, for example

We read books - books set in the country, scholarly books about the country (we often just show some pictures and disseminate brief stories orally at a level our preschoolers can appreciate and understand), books about immigrants from that country, about the indigenous species, an aspect of the daily life, and for our elders, our Full Day students, myths and legends that so capture the essence of the culture. 

We try to have a holiday as part of our unit of study and they are very simple celebrations.  My magic formula is this : Gather, sing your song, fly your flag, maybe read a good book that is set in the country. Eat a special snack that is of the country.  Dance to the music, possibly holding the mask or maraca or flag you made in the arts and crafts section of the study.  One of our families who is homeschooling likes to make a special meal featuring the cuisine of the country about which they are learning and play appropriately cultural music while dining.  How delightful.  That is all the celebration one needs, in my opinion.  Children are very easily satisfied by the most pared-down of festivities.  When we studied Jamaica, the highlight was cutting and eating a pineapple outdoors after we sang all our Harry Belafonte songs.  That's it!  And they loved it.  They probably came home talking about it.  No need to overdo.  Save something for their quinceaneras and bar mitzvahs, no?

Is that helpful, Gentle Parent, or have we moved into "sorry I asked" territory?  I do tend to run on, don't I?  And I am one of the less rabid Montessorians you are likely to meet!   On another note, Gentle Parents, we all learned yesterday that we will not be back in session this school year.  I know we are all very sorry about that and we must mourn that loss.  Some of your children will be especially sad and I encourage you not to distract them or dissuade them from their sadness.  This is a loss they can manage and this is a prime time, developmentally, to learn that we can withstand loss: that we are resilient and that grief is not a permanent feeling.  Let your child know that it is only proper that they should feel sad, if they do, and that this awful feeling will not last forever. Their response to this adversity (like everything they experience during the First Plane of Development) will become part of their core, their personality and the adult they are creating.  Missing all of our kids and their families,I remain,

Your Guide,
Doni

Wednesday, April 8, 2020

Watching TV for All of You!

Gentle Parents,

I have every confidence that you are sparing your children the stress of the daily news, especially these days.  Thank you.  There are different kinds of stress, some of which help us grow, like meeting a deadline or learning a challenging new skill.  The kind of stress that goes on and on (remind you of any viruses you know?) is toxic  - damaging to the physical health as well as normal brain development - and we should all be protecting ourselves from it.

That said, I have been watching LOTS of TV!  No kids here!  And I learn about all the cool things people are doing to entertain themselves and others during the stay-at-home order, celebrities included.  Andy, the cynic, says it is just so all these stars can remain relevant while the theaters, concert halls and comedy clubs are shut down, but I choose to believe that it is done in the spirit of solidarity.  We are all home!

So, after the kids are in bed and you are snuggling with your phones, you might do the following Youtube searches - "Tic Toc Doc" (this doctor teaches his hospital colleagues to do little dances and they post them.  Turns out this guy is from our own OHSU!)  Search for "dancing nurses," "family parodies One Day More," "Toronto Symphony Appalachian Spring" (from their various homes, the musicians played this in support of Americans), "James Corden Homefest" (like Carpool Karaoke with celebs, but from home, I think), "The Show Must Go On" You Tube channel is premiering a Broadway show every Friday night and then it's available for the weekend. The free HBO app (available during this difficult time) offers The Sopranos, VEEP and other favorites which I haven't seen. Lastly, search YouTube for "CBS Our Country" to see stripped-down performances by today's country stars performing while isolating at home who were supposed to appear at the Academy of Country Music Awards last Sunday, April 5. It was somehow comforting to see sweethearts, bandmates, families with little kids using their cell phones and laptops to share their songs and homes with us. 

Today, I heard about an app called Seek by i-Naturalist.  This allows you to take pics of flora - flowers and leaves, at least - and it identifies them for you and keeps track of all your sightings.  I think that sounds like a lot of fun and I always wish I knew more names of plants! Now, perhaps you, Gentle Parents, who are so much more hip and happening than Yours Truly, already know about all of these entertainments.  Forgive an elder for prattling on.  I do it for Andy on the daily!

Tune in tomorrow as I respond to some parents inquiring about geography studies at home.

Appreciate this beautiful day, Gentle Parents, and please encourage all of those in your sphere to continue to Stay Home-Save Lives.  It is working in Oregon! Feeling so fortunate to live exactly here, I remain,

Your Guide,
Doni

Tuesday, April 7, 2020

The Game of "Listen and Do"

Dearest Guide,

Since my son is so young I haven't been particularly focused on any "academic" activities.  Just lots of art, play dough, books and puzzles.  Other than daily stuff like helping with cooking, gardening and household tasks, are there ideas you would recommend for someone so young?

Signed,  Hunkering Down at Home



Dear  Hunkering,

It sounds like your son's home life is already very rich and you sound enviably calm, cool and casual.  If your son enjoys counting, there is a lot of fun to be had there.  When you and your son simply recite numbers, but aren't counting anything in particular, you can do it in unison, or, if he is unsure of the order of the numbers, you can do a call and response sort of thing.   You say the number then he does from 1-10?  20?  Higher? Do it as long as it is fun for him or until the microwave popcorn is ready, whichever comes first.  To do actual "counting," you need objects.  Otherwise, as in the above scenario, it is chanting or reciting.  When counting, one is counting something.

What to count?  All the dining room chairs, all the chairs in the house, all the pillows, all the forks, all the pebbles in this small bowl, how many times I am clapping my hands, how many doors on the kitchen cabinets, how many pieces of mail arrived today (now wash your hands - 20 seconds, lots of rubbing), how many dog toys Fido has, etc.  With that bowl of pebbles, or dried beans or smallest Lego bricks, you can also do some grouping and arranging.  Make groups of 3 and line them up.  Count them.  You are counting by threes.  Count by other numbers.  Or your son may arrange the beans in some order only visible to him, enchanted.
   
          "Respect all the reasonable forms of activity in which the child engages
            and try to understand them."   Maria Montessori


Another game which nearly every child in our class loves is "Listen and Do."  This is a game from the language area and it is part of the most important group of the language area, which is Language in the Air.  To play, one gathers the children, makes eye contact with each player to ensure you have the group's attention and deliver a command; "Close the door to the Sunflower Room.....Eduardo."  Then wait while Eduardo follows that command. Once he returns, give another command; "Lay on your belly and hum..... Adam."  Adam does.  " Put one bean from the spooning activity on the top of the chalkboard rack and clap your hands 4 times...........Jasmina."

Did you notice how the commands were of differing difficulty?  That is because we have a range of ages and abilities in our class, as do all traditional Montessori schools.  In a home setting, with one child, you would not need such a range, but would stick to commands your child can do and a number of commands in a row that he can remember.  This may be one, two or three commands.  Commands are more difficult if they are unrelated.  For example, "open the drawer, remove a fork and place it in the sink" is easier than " lay on your back, stick your finger in the goldfish bowl and open the button box" even though in both examples, there are 3 actions.

To prepare for this activity, spend some time planning and writing down your commands.  You may not know how successful your child will be in following the commands, so even for one child, have a variety of commands, with  differing levels of difficulty so that you can be flexible.  If what you command at first is very easy for your child, after a few turns at that level, take it up a notch.  If your  child cannot follow the direction you gave, be prepared to scale back to something simpler.
Some examples? Easiest : clap your hands, pat your belly, touch your nose, smile, hug me, lay down, run around, walk to Mama, etc.   One step up would be to combine two of the above: smile and pat your belly.  Harder; use objects in your environment: Take the lid off my sewing box and take out a spool of thread. Crawl under the dining room table and touch all the chairs.  Jiggle a doorknob and flick a light switch. Again, actions that are related are easier than those that are unrelated.   Do one, two or three such commands, depending on ability. Preparation will help you to lead the game with confidence, but after a short while, you will be proficient at coming up with commands off the top of your head.  Now you always have a fun game with you to play anywhere!

Sometimes, kids cannot follow your commands.  They weren't listening, perhaps.  Did you notice how I name the child who is to do the command after I state the directions?  That way everyone is listening.  If I say the child's name first, that gives the others permission to lose focus.  Maybe your child cannot follow the directions because she did not understand some of the words you used.  Maybe she could not remember both of the actions you gave her.  Maybe she doesn't know where your sewing box is.  At school, I usually give another child a chance to follow the command.  Was anyone else listening? Can they show us all the actions?   But in a home setting, with a young child such as your son, I would help him to follow the command. An older sibling could do this as well.  Repeat the command or show him the object whose name he did not know or show him what you mean by "jiggle."  Make it fun!  Are you having fun?  If so, you are doing it right.

Besides the fun and bonding experience you will have with your  son, you are giving him an opportunity to work on so many important developmental tasks: his ability to process spoken language, build working memory, augment vocabulary of nouns, verbs and prepositions,  increase awareness of his surroundings,  practice large and small motor skills and work on his ability to master his will to such a degree that he can obey another.

           "To the casual onlooker the child seems to be learning exactitude and grace of action,
           to be refining his senses, to be learning how to read and write; but much more profoundly
            he is learning how to become his own master."     Maria Montessori

Gentle Parent, I hope you and your son enjoy all that counting and the game of "Listen and Do." I can tell from the rest of your letter that you are really enjoying your time at home with him.  Wishing you continued contentment in your casa, I remain,

Your Guide,
Doni

Monday, April 6, 2020

Edison's Day

Gentle Parents,

Available to us for the month of April, in the comfort of our own homes, at no charge, is the video "Edison's Day," which follows 20 month old Edison as he goes to his Montessori school and participates in the life of his family, including self-care and household duties.  It is charming and 30 minutes long.  It may inspire us all to heed the child's cry "help me to do it myself."   Go to
https://vimeo.com/ondemand/edisonsday/        Use the promo code FREEAPRIL  and follow the instructions.  I think you'll enjoy it.

Your Guide,
Doni

Our Oatmeal Bread Recipe!

Gentle Parents,

Allow me to begin by making a correction.  Since writing the recent post "Let's Be Italian!" I suggested as a practical life task for children the washing of produce in a bath of water and a small amount of dish detergent.  I have since read on the Center for Disease Control's website that that is unsafe and plain tap water is recommended. My apologies.  

I have received several requests for the bread recipe that some of our children have used to bake in our classroom.  At school, baking is an advanced activity that requires not only many practical life skills, but also the ability to read.  The child who is preparing oneself for this activity practices reading the recipe until that becomes somewhat fluent.  Jessica then spends a good portion of a morning with our first-time baker to guide and supervise the entire process.  On the following days, the child is permitted to choose the bread-baking work to do alone anytime, but it must be started first thing in the morning in order to be baked off by noon. We then send some of the bread home and use some of it to accompany the cheeses and spreads that the children enjoy for their snack.  Jessica learned of the following recipe at a Montessori baking and sewing workshop which greatly inspired her and has since enriched our casa.  This is a great recipe because it is very forgiving of error (a very Montessori concept) and is simple-ish to read, especially in the book beautifully made and clearly illustrated by the talented hand of  our own Alalia Berry.  Have fun baking this bread side-by-side with your child.  I'm betting this bread will evoke fond olfactory and gustatory memories!  

                                                                        

                                                                OATMEAL BREAD


    Ingredients:
                                                                           
1 cup white flour
1 1/2 cup whole wheat flour
2/3 cup oats
1 1/4 cup water
1 1/2 teaspoon salt, divided
1 teaspoon yeast
2 tablespoon oil
1 tablespoon honey
extra flour for sprinkling on the board

1) Pour oats in a small bowl.
2) Pour water on oats.
3) Cook in microwave for 2 minutes
4) Add 1/2 teaspoon salt, 2 tablespoons oil and 1 tablespoon honey to the oats
5) Stir well.
6) Sprinkle 1 teaspoon yeast on oat mixture.
7) In medium bowl, gently stir white flour and whole wheat flour together.
8) Stir oat mixture.
9) Pour the oat mixture into the flour mixture.
10) Stir until all of the flour is mostly formed into a ball.
11) Sprinkle a little flour on the board.  
12) Put the dough on the board and knead until it is smooth and springy.
13) Put the dough in a large bowl and cover it with a towel. 
14) Put it in a warm place to rise.  
15) Set the timer for 60 minutes.
16) Oil the 4 loaf pans (or one big loaf pan) Clean up your work.
17) When the timer rings, press the dough flat and cut into 4 equal pieces. 
       Omit this step if using one full-size loaf pan.
18) Shape into loaves and put into 4 tiny loaf pans or shape into one large loaf and place in pan.
19) Cover the pans with a towel and let rise.
20) Set the timer for 20 minutes for small pans and up to 60 minutes for large.
21) Ask an adult to turn on the oven to 350 degrees.
22) When the oven is hot, bake for 25 minutes for small loaves, 40 for large.  Be sure to set the timer.
23) When the timer rings, ask an adult to help check the bread.
24) When the bread is done, set the pans on the cooling rack.  

  Have fun trying this recipe and enjoy this bread, the "staff of life."  Happy baking!

Your Guide,
Doni                                                                    

Friday, April 3, 2020

The Great Outdoors!

Dearest Guide,

We are following your blog daily and loving it.  I've shared it with my friends with children not at PhMS, too!  My question:

My children are happier if they get time outside.  However, I have to cajole, drag and bribe (!) them to get out there.  This can be especially daunting on those rainy days.  Invariably, out outdoor adventure brings smiles to all our faces, mud-splattered or no.  Can you suggest activities or ways to make the transition outdoors more appealing?

Signed, Craving Fresh Air


Dear Craving,

What a well-timed letter!  I just saw the forecast and dry, sunny days in the 60's are headed our way this Tuesday-Thursday at least.  But we will address ways to get outdoors when the weather is foul as well.  My Big Idea is to have a destination to head to in the yard. Someplace a bit homey, a bit comfy: a place that beckons you and invites you to linger.  This could be your patio set, made comfy with cushions and blankets.  A hammock or other roost set up within sight of the birdfeeder would invite cozy, quiet birdwatching.  I used to receive a magazine called "Birds and Blooms" and the best photos were those of children sitting so still in the garden as to have birdies perch upon them.  A blanket spread on the ground under a very dense tree that would protect one from the drizzle.  Is it too early to set up a tent?  A real tent if there is one, or a sheet tacked to a fence up high, stretched out and weighted at the bottom by heavy rocks?  Some of your kids are fort-building geniuses.  Perhaps there are some places, (a dry patio?) and some materials (the patio furniture, second-best sheets, pillows with washable pillow slips?) that could be commandeered for your troops.  As the weather gets finer, these various nests can be feathered with all sorts of comforts, which will need to be curated and limited, quite likely, from time to time.  Some other thoughts on getting your kids outdoors?  Let's use bullet points!

*   Transitions are hard for many children. Give a 15, 10 or 5 minute heads up to the kids to let them know you will begin suiting up to go outdoors at that time.

*   Have backpacks with any of the following you can muster -  a magnifying glass, binoculars, notebooks and pens, first aid kit, bird or tree identification book, small water bottles, lip balm, soft bucket hats, sip lock bags for collecting nature artifacts (this can lead to pressing flowers and leaves, which leads to collages with those flowers and leaves), plastic bag and gloves for collecting trash and, drum-roll, please.................a surprise snack! What am I forgetting?  You will think of it.

*   Prepare a basket with slips of paper within, each having a Point of Interest for a Walk or Yard Investigation or Outdoor Activity, such as: How  many cars are parked on our street?  How many of our neighbors are outdoors?  How many dogs are in their yards?  Which tree is the tallest in our yard/street?  The prettiest?  The shadiest?  How many different kinds of flowers are in bloom in our yard/street?  Take a walk with giant steps.  Walk backwards for a while.  Practice safely crossing a street at an intersection.  Sing as you walk.  Lay on your back and talk about clouds.  Take cuttings from the yard for indoor arrangements. (obviously, this leads to Flower Arranging, later!)   Sweep the deck, patio, front steps, sidewalk.  Wash your bikes.  Draw outdoors. Gentle Parent, please supply the remainder.

*   Create shelves outdoors on the covered deck or patio with Practical Life and Art activities. If you lack an outdoor covered area, perhaps this area is near the outdoor space - by the sliding glass door or in the mud room. (I WISH I had a mud room!)   A bucket with scrub brush, bar or travel-size bottle of (very dilute) soap and a sponge is a set-up to wash many things.  Add a towel if the item should be dried rather than air-dried, garden tools (give a lesson and supervise for safety, always), a flower press (can be made of a book, sheets of newspaper and bricks/books to weigh it), crayons, tempera paints, chalk, paper and an easle or low table, a box of watercolors, a little dish for rinsing the brush (a shot glass is perfect), a bird book and binoculars in a basket, a sewing activity, outdoor games, etc.

*   Provide a similar basket or bag, but more like a scavenger hunt or command game; Seek the highest place where you play in our yard.  Stand where we saw the wild turkeys. Touch your favorite place in the back yard.  Find the prettiest view of our house from the street.  Walk down the street until you touch 20 trees.  Sit by the feeder until 5 birds come to dine.  Leave a bouquet on a neighbor's doorstep.  And on. No matter that your children cannot read these slips. You can be the reader!

*  Set an expectation in your family that you will go out each day unless The Elders decree it imprudent. Have a family meeting to establish this new normal if needed.  Each day at breakfast or some other, early morning communal time, the day's weather can be discussed and the time of day for your outing can be set.  If the mood strikes and the kids go out earlier than planned, I guess you can decide if you still wish to keep your Set Outdoor Time.

Gentle Parent, there are at least 6 solid ideas up there and I thank you so much for writing and getting me to jostle them out of my brain.  I hope you enjoy at least one of them or that they spark some inspiration for you.  Time spent outdoors is scientifically proven to boost mood, health and well-being.  Attachment to the earth is a spiritual bond connecting us to something larger and more timeless than ourselves, which, is a great comfort and solace.  A sense of  place can be formed at a young age that stays with us all our lives.  How I remember the of the alley of ferns, the dark patio completely sheltered by low evergreens, the strawberry patch, the tiger grass.  We are animals and part of nature.  It isn't good to be too distant from our home.  Fellow dendrophiles, I remain,

Your Guide,
Doni

PS "Lean on Me" songwriter, Bill Withers, passed away of heart complications at the age of 81 on March 30,2020.  Won't you join me in dancing to his "Lovely Day" (on YouTube) with your family in the living room or in your bedroom with the door locked?  The lyrics are lovely: the groove and sound, sublime!  This may be played at my own funeral along with "Love Train." Thanks, Bill.  Rest in Peace.

Thursday, April 2, 2020

Let's Be Italian!

I will have to do some serious sleep hygiene when life returns to normal.  I'm afraid my habit these days  is to rise in the wee hours of the night and watch the news on TV.  I have been a troubled sleeper for decades now, but I usually just lie there, knowing I must get up at 5 (unless I blow off my workout, which buys me another hour of lying there, sleepless).  These days, I do not set an alarm and can take a nap at any time.  So I indulge myself.  Watching the news, however, takes me to a very dark and sad place.  It seems that death is all around us.  I fear for myself and my loved ones and all of you. My heart aches for those in the thick of it, in New York, Spain, Italy, China. I pray it doesn't come to that here.

I suggest that in solidarity with the good people in Italy, we do our best to carry on their verve for "La Dolce Vita."  What do Italian people talk about at breakfast?  Lunch!  What to cook!  Breakfast was very light and easily cleared away, so now we can begin preparing the main meal of the day and all it's courses, pasta for primo, fish, meat, eggs or cheese for secondo and maybe a contorno (side dish).  I was just reading that many people now enjoy their main meal in the evening because lunch has become, sadly, "a quick bite."  But schoolchildren are dismissed early enough to be home for lunch at 1 or 2 pm, having had a merenda (a snack, often a sandwich) at school.  When I was an exchange student in a German high school, we had a "Pause" for a sandwich around 10, too.  Then, like the Italians, we would come home to a heavenly hot meal.

Since we have so much time at home these days, it is  a great opportunity to spend more time in the kitchen cooking with our kids.  I believe that many of you (the throngs!) who read this blog are already doing this.  Just for fun, let's list some food preparation tasks for the kids to help us with:
For 2-3 year olds, at a low table or supervised closely on a step-stool at the sink/counter:  washing produce (swishing it around in a just-sanitized sink of water or large basin/bowl with some dish soap long enough to loosen any invisible ick, then rinsing), tearing lettuce, pulling the leaves off stems of rosemary, thyme, parsley, etc, working with dough, drizzling the espresso on the ladyfingers for the tiramisu, stirring ingredients in over-size bowls (those ingredients tend to stay in the bowl better if it is large), crushing, by hand or with an implement, cornflakes or  potato chips in a sealed, airless bag to top a casserole (why yes, I am from the mid-west!) scrambling eggs, dumping cups of ingredients into mixing bowls, spreading nut butters, soft cheeses and other spreads on sturdy bread, bagels or crackers. All of the above are so good for hand-eye coordination, dexterity and fine motor development!  The hand must be developed to be the best servant of the mind and spirit. 

  For 4-5 year olds, they would enjoy all of the above, as well as more difficult tasks such as: peeling carrots and cukes, slicing softer foods like cucumbers, celery and cheese, staffing the toaster and buttering the toast.  You might soften that butter if you don't want your toast to look as if it's been used for target practice.Perhaps melt it and brush it on with a pastry brush. They can scrub, pierce and butter the potatoes for baking, grate carrots, potatoes, zucchini and pecorino, grease your pans, measure your dry and wet ingredients, sift flour, tenderize meat (put it in a sealed bag to prevent an e-coli festival) and flip pancakes.  Now, you haven't hired Emeril to cater your meal, you know, you must be present for all of this.  The children require supervision, primarily for their safety, but also for their success.  Please show your child how to do these tasks, then allow them to do the work.  When you need to re-present an action or bring attention to a technique or other point of interest, step in warmly.  "Okay!  I am so glad we are doing this, aren't you?  Let me take a turn.  I want to show you how to keep the spoon low in the bowl while stirring................okay, now it's your turn again." And you already knew that everything would take longer, be messier and look uglier than if you did it yourself, right?  I knew you knew!

6-7 year olds are ready for more challenging knife skills, such as fine chopping of nuts, broccoli, cauliflower, carrots, and tough stuff like that. Give them a good,sharp knife.  I read a Consumer Reports review of the knife set Andy and I use at home, which is never very sharp.  "These knives are the reason people cut themselves" read the review.  Sharp is safer, but not if you put your fingers in the path of the blade.  The safest technique for chopping is to have one's dominant hand on the handle, the other hand with palm on the dull side of the blade, palm flat, fingers well out of the way, just moving that knife back and forth, up and down over the pieces to be cut, for as long as it takes.  One can pause to scrape the food back to the center of the cutting board from time to time. If at any time your  child is being unsafe, step in to re-present.  If your child continues to use the tools unsafely, it is time to end the exercise.  "Thank you for your help.  I will take it from here.  Would you like me to give you another, less high-risk task?" Or whatever you say to put the kibosh on shenanigans at your house.  Kids of this age may be reading and ready to follow a recipe.  Read it through several times in advance.  Assemble the ingredients.  I suggest you do it together a time or two before Junior takes it on him/herself.  When the day arrives for a solo flight on that tiramisu, stand back respectfully, but be ready to help if called.

Like all tasks, cooking has a beginning, middle and end. In Montessori, we talk about the 3 step cycle.  The beginning is rolling up the sleeves and washing the hands, perhaps putting on an apron, making sure the work space is clear and clean and getting out the ingredients and tools and placing them in some order. At this time, we are summoning our psychic energies and preparing our minds for the upcoming activity. The second step is the performance of the actual task, some of which are so absorbing that the child achieves a state of concentration leading to normalization, the state in which the child's energies are coursing naturally. The final step is the cleaning up, the putting away, during which time the mind is resting, purging and re-organizing.  All of the steps are important, not only for the child's self-creation, but for integrating the concept of personal responsibility. The child is also practicing the role of nurturer and provider. This child is contributing. She feels even more a part of the family group now than when she was merely a recipient.

  The child need not do any of the 3 steps alone, if that is overwhelming, daunting, off-putting or impossible.  Working side-by-side with a parent or other beloved elder is a joy to the child.  Perhaps it is a time to converse: perhaps a time to work side by side in silence. Or what could exemplify "La Dolce Vita" better than an entire family convivially preparing wholesome food together, nurturing mind, body and spirit simultaneously?  Remember the fun scene in "The Big Chill" when they are all laughing and dancing and cleaning up after dinner together to "Ain't Too Proud to Beg?"  Aim for that.  I suspect that many of my readers are real whizzes in the kitchen and regularly involve their children in their gastronomic adventures and have many more ideas than the few I mention here.  Please feel free to leave your great suggestions in the "comments" for all to benefit from.

You may have noticed that I did not answer a reader's letter today.  That is because your Guide's mailbag is sadly empty.  Please send your feedback, input, questions and queries to me at the school phmsch@gmail.com or leave a comment down at the bottom of the page. Let me know if this blog can be more helpful to you in some way.  I live to serve!  Wishing you a beautiful day, I remain,

Your Guide,
Doni

Tuesday, March 31, 2020

You Gotta Sing!


Yesterday, I discovered that I can speak into my TV remote and say, "Green Day karaoke Youtube" and all these karaoke choices pop up on my screen!  I suspect my TV and remote are capable of all sorts of things of which I have no inkling!  Upon unearthing this lyrical treasure trove,  I chased Andy out of the living room with my caterwauling.  It's not as good as singing with the kids, but it was fun.  I don't have the usual amount of alternative rock coursing through me as I usually fuel up on tunes during my 40 minute commute between Albany and Philomath.   You can often catch me at 7:15, having a hot flash, windows down, tearing off my cardigan, singing along to Foo Fighters or Red Hot Chili Peppers on any day Monday through Thursday, that is, until March 12. 

I saw a report that of the streaming stations, the most popular during the stay-at-home order are classical, folk and children's songs.  That, of course, made me think of the classical music we often use for Walking on the Line and the folk and children's songs we love so much.   If your kids are missing some of their PhMS favorites, I looked up some which were available on Youtube.  If your kids would like you to lead or participate in a singing circle, you might use these videos to ascertain the actual tune and lyrics, which you can also search separately, of course.  I just have to chuckle when I hear myself advising others on how to use the internet!  Where do I get off, really?  It's so comical! 

You can find the following Raffi favorites that we sing at school: Baby Beluga, Robin in the Rain, You Gotta Sing (which only displays the lyrics and might be a nice reading experience for someone), Wheels on the Bus, Apples and Bananas.  You can find Tom Chapin's "This Pretty Planet," Linda Allen's "The Dandelion Song," Red Granger's "I Think You're Wonderful," and Mr Rodgers' "Its You I Like."  In this clip, the song itself doesn't appear until 4 minutes 15 seconds in.  He is interviewing a neighbor boy who uses a wheelchair and then sings to the boy.  There are probably many more.  I looked up our Continent Song, but the tune was very different AND they say "Australia" instead of the more inclusive "Oceania," which I also used to do, once upon a time. I offer you this curated list of songs to enjoy with your kids during our time apart. 

Just a short one today.  Sometimes, more isn't better.  Speaking of which, please do read my old post, "Affluenza: Too Much, Too Soon?" from September 18, 2014.  I think it's still very good and carries an important message.  Have a wonderful day at home, friends!

Your Guide,
Doni

Monday, March 30, 2020

Concerned Granny to the Rescue!

Greetings on this drizzly Monday morning!  Your Guide is such a creature of habit that my weekend had a weekend "feel" to it that my M-F did not.  I confess, I binge-watched "Serengeti" on The Discovery Channel, but I almost couldn't take it!  Life is rough on the Serengeti!  I became very attached to a baboon, a zebra foal, a lioness, a hyena, an African wild dog and an elephant.  Watching their trials and tribulations tore at my heart!  I also turned my living room into an exercise studio and did a hip hop workout I found on YouTube.  Moving the furniture was my warm up and cool down!
But today, it's back to work, here in my office, looking out on the garden and greenhouse, where my cat lives, and beyond that, the cattle ranch and Christmas tree farm which our property abuts.  Let's see if we received any mail over the weekend.  Here we are!

Dearest Guide,

We are blessed to be three generations sheltering together during the coronavirus crisis.  It is lovely to spend so much time with everyone, but I have one concern.  My granddaughters, who are very young, spend a lot of time on their parents' electronic tablets and when they are not playing games or watching videos on them, they are campaigning to do so.  It isn't very pretty to hear how they whine and how desperate they seem to be for these devices.  I find it very disturbing.  Beyond their behavior around the screentime, isn't it bad for their brain development?

                                                    Signed,   Good-hearted Grandma

Gentle Grandparent,

It is so difficult to sit aside and watch your children raise their own children sometimes, is it not?  I am a grandparent myself and can truly relate. Your influence, however, is already felt by your granddaughters in the decency and integrity you model for them, the results of the rearing of  your own children and who knows, perhaps even a genetic component?  I'm sure you will have a lasting and positive influence on the formation of their personalities.

 Yours is a timely missive as I'm sure many of the families of the children I live with in the Children's House at Philomath Montessori School are also struggling with the issue of screentime as they spend so many hours at home.  First of all, I am familiar with the dynamic you are describing.  It seems that screens can be very addictive and that quality can certainly bring about the ugly side of any of us.

Please allow me to refer you to two previous posts on our blog.  If you could induce the parents of your granddaughters to read them, it might offer them food for thought.  After some time, thought and observation on their side, they may re-consider their children's overuse of their devices.  Please go to the archives and read "Tiny Little Addicts" from October 24, 2013 and "Movie Time" from May 10, 2011.  If these contain compelling information you wish to share, please do so. I think they explain some of the brain science that addresses your concerns very well.  I hope your granddaughters end up with more blocks and walks and less scrolling and clicking during their time at home with you and throughout their childhoods. Thank you very much for writing.  In solidarity and appreciation, I remain,

Your Guide,
Doni

PS: I am concerned  about the many children who are truly "stuck" at home with families who are incapable of caring properly for them: children for whom school was an escape to safety, security and sustenance.  I called Family Tree Relief Nursery in Albany today to see how I could help.  They are closed per the governor's order, but are still providing support to families.  They are checking in with families via phone calls, using FaceTime with the children and have sent home activity packets and playdo.  When I called they were putting together food boxes for their families in need. I made a donation over the phone and they were so touched! Thank goodness this agency is there.